Evangelicals Ruin Something Else

Here's the copy from a recent Christian Book Distributor (CBD) advertisement:

Toto Baggypants (Junior Asparagus) is a young Flobbit who has inherited a mysterious bean with unique powers from his uncle Billboy (Archibald Asparagus). Toto sets out on a quest to discover the bean's purpose with Ear-a-Corn (Larry the Cucumber), Leg-o-Lamb (Jimmy Gourd), and the dwarf Grumpy (Pa Grape). Their quest is full of adventure, great danger (beware of the evil Sporks!) and much laughter. Join this fellowship as they climb Much Snowia, endure the Razzberry Forest, and eventually trek deep into the land of Woe. Will the "Fellowship of the Bean" complete their quest?

This new VeggieTales episode also features the original song "It's About Love" by country music star Wynonna Judd. Plus Larry the Cucumber, dressed up like Elvis, is featured in a special edition of Silly Songs with Elves!


I mean, granted it's not the Bible, but good night. Forget rolling over - Tolkien must on a rotisserie in his grave. I have never read the Lord of the Rings series, but I have listened to all 40+ 90-minute cassettes of the unabridged version three times. The ease with which one can identify biblical themes may be up for discussion, but LoTR is a piece of literary art. And these guys, making sure that cute 'n shallow win out, have made it into velvet painting.

How dare I criticize when I haven't even watched it? No need to - the problem is the concept. I don't care if the edible elves win a stinking Oscar. We've already got the Lord of the Universe portrayed as a baby carrot. Can someone put this crowd in a freezer bag before they work their dumb-down magic on anything else? Here's the message kiddies - don't take anything of substance seriously. We can make a cartoon of it.

Oh yeah:

8. A plush doll of Martin Luther that says "Here I stand" when you squeeze his belly.

8 comments:

Noah said...

Come on, its a kids video, it is supposed to be funny. Can't we be funny?

Peter Bogert said...

My point is that evangelicalism is shallow enough. When funny and cute are prized as virtues - or as necessities to entertain the kids (and adults) - we're not doing ourselves any favors.

Phil (Col 1:27-28) said...

Amen! We have assumed that children are unable to handle anything of substance and truth.

I do not want to even get started on the whole dumbing down of the church issue. The proof is in the pudding, as it were.

Thanks for the post Peter.

Blessings in Christ Jesus!

Carla said...

"Can someone put this crowd in a freezer bag before they work their dumb-down magic on anything else?"

lol... now that, was funny.

Some years ago we bought the whole collection of produce-videos for the kids, for Christmas. Cute, funny, catchy, etc.

After watching a few of them I noticed the name of Christ was never mentioned. Not once. Odd, I thought, for alleged Christian videos to never mention the name of Christ.

I wrote to the top carrot of this organization to ask why. Their answer? "We don't want to offend or exclude anyone, so we simply present a moral message".

How lovely.

John Schroeder said...

Interesting Peter. I've linked here

John said...

Peter, great post, linked this at Around The Bilogs!
GBYAY

cwv warrior said...

Well, okay. I will be the first to back a fellow Pennsylvanian, and say the Church is a mess. I also confess that we had a blast with Veggietales with our kids! And they were older too. I fed them meat during our homeschooling. Fun is good, yes?

Peter Bogert said...

Aw, it's not a mess everywhere. For all the goofy things that are out there - and that tempt us to be goofy - there are numbers of churches that are trying to do it right. They are not packed with people, but they are trying to be faithful.

I'm not really as perturbed as I sound. I think what they've done is dopey, and I do protest the dumbing down of Christian truth, but I'm not going to lose sleep over vegetables - except for the Baby Jesus Carrot. That's WAY over the top.